Last Sunday, October 13, we had our pamamanhikan, which is a tradition in the Philippines wherein the groom, accompanied by his family, visits the bride and her family to formally ask the bride’s parents for their blessing.
Here is a definition taken from kasal.com:
From the word panik (which means to ascend or to climb a house’s flight of stairs), pamamanhikan is “the asking for the girl’s parents’ permission to wed the affianced pair.” The custom symbolizes honor and respect for the parents, seeking their blessing and approval before getting married.
Prior to our pamamanhikan, we had already received the blessing of our parents, and so last Sunday’s affair was more of a casual getting-to-know-you dinner than a formal and strict gathering.
We held the dinner at my older sister Melay’s house in Makati. This is the house I grew up in. We chose this as our venue so that it would be equally accessible to all (most of my family on my mother’s side live in Marikina, whereas Casey’s family lives in Las Piñas. Also, my lola lives in this house and cannot travel far very often). It was a good decision, particularly because no one was in a hurry to leave. 🙂
Some couples include only the immediate family in the pamamanhikan, but in our case, my mama invited her sisters and their families, which made for a fun gathering! A few of my cousins who are currently staying with my lola joined the merriment as well. Then for Casey’s family, aside from his mother, father, sister, brother, and brother’s wife, his tita (mother’s sister) to whom he is particularly close was also present.
The affair was supposed to be a merienda cena (snack before dinner), but naturally, it became more of an early dinner because of the amount of food involved (Filipinos love to eat). Casey brought Korean beef stew (he loves to cook and is great at it!). Casey’s family brought spaghetti, shanghai rolls, vegetable lumpia, coffee jelly, bibingka, and beer. My mama brought carbonara and crabstick mango salad. My papa brought wine. My sister Melay prepared fish fingers. My titas brought fish, fried chicken, and espasol. Yummy!
We started eating at around 6 pm. The food was not only high in quantity but in quality as well! Several recipes were exchanged between the two families. 🙂
Since we had already received the blessing of our parents, the time after dinner was spent discussing our plans for the wedding and after the wedding. We shared our ideas and experiences canvassing for potential wedding suppliers, and our family gave us suggestions and advice.
The pamamanhikan made me realize that we are so lucky that my family and his family are both happy for us and willing to help in the planning process. One major reason I decided to create this blog is so that I can ensure that our families can be constantly updated on our wedding preparations.
I think that everyone was pleased with how the pamamanhikan turned out. Thank you to Melay for letting us hold the event at her house. And thank you to everyone who was there to support us and help in our plans! 🙂
For pictures from last Sunday, scroll down till the very end. I posted a gallery at the bottom of this site. 🙂